Energy

I’m a little late to the party again this week, and trying to catch up with the assignments for Blogging 101.  First up is Monday’s assignment to take the daily prompt and make it personal, publishing a post as a result.  Since the assignment came from Monday I’ll use Monday’s prompt.

Re-springing your step

Tell us about the last experience you had that left you feeling fresh, energized, and rejuvenated. What was it that had such a positive effect on you?

At first glance this looks like a fairly easy one to interpret.  It probably should be.  But when you’re struggling with depression then experiences that leave you feeling fresh, energized and rejuvenated can be few and far between.  That should mean that these moments should stand out though, no?  Unfortunately the low points in between tend to cloud things.

What you actually tend to notice more are the smaller things.  The days where you don’t have to psyche yourself up first in order to get out of bed.  Or take a shower.  Or leave the house.  These things that many take for granted are the experiences I often pick up on as evidence I’m feeling fresh and energized and rejuvenated.  As evidence that I might actually have a good day, when really all I’m having is a day.

That’s not to say that the big upswings aren’t appreciated.  Or important.  I had one this weekend.  A trip to watch the ice hockey team I support.  Before this game I hadn’t been able to get along to one in over a year.  A saw friends I hadn’t spoken to in the same time, and some I see more often but still far too infrequently.

And the team won.  Convincingly.

It was a very good day.  An actual very good day and not just one masquerading as good, in comparison to the rest.  It was great.  I have no idea when the crash is coming.  Part of my personality means I tend to focus on the worry about that and less on the good things as they’re happening.  It’s something I need to work on and get better at.  And I’m trying.  I’m still trying to revel in the good of the hockey trip, when not too long ago I’d be entirely thinking about the crash to come.

It’s some kind of progress.

Advertisements

4 thoughts on “Energy

  1. I love your post. I also struggle with depression and completely relate to what you’re saying. I’m going to try and do as you do and not take the small things for granted when for me they’re actually massive achievements. It’s just so hard to remember that when you’re constantly resisting the urge to compare with what other people are able to do!

    • Thanks!

      I also have social anxiety so I’m not only comparing myself to other people but constantly worry about what they think about my efforts.

      It’s definitely hard to do, and I don’t always manage it, but when it works it can really help.

      I hope things get easier for you 🙂

  2. Pingback: Poem / Poetry – “Made Whole Again” | toofulltowrite (I've started so I'll finish)

  3. Pingback: Small Pleasures: Week #1 | lizzyreadsbooks

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s